The Rime of the Postmodern Mariner

More ramblings of Rhys Hughes.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

RHYS HUGHES... Complete Story List

Although I started writing short stories in 1981 (or maybe 1980) all those early works are lost. My earliest surviving story dates from 1989.

My scheme is to write exactly 1000 stories.

There follows a complete list of every story I have written for this scheme so far. All 831 of them. As this list grows, I'll edit this blog entry to keep up!

(1989)
* Raindancing
* The Third Blow

(1990)
* Big Game
* The 4-D Mind

(1991)
* Towards a New Arcana
* Interview with the City Treasurer
* An Ideal Vocation
* The Fury Machine
* Circular Reasoning
* The Catastrophe Trials
* Nathaniel

(1992)
* The Unbearable Lightness of Being a Dirigible
* The Younger Man
* The Magic Lamp
* Cutting Back
* The World Idiot
* Reflections of a Brass Head
* Friends
* Stepping Out
* Lucy
* The Cat
* The Journal
* One Better
* Thinner Air
* The Smile Inside
* The End of the Road
* Twelve Candles
* The Cellar Door
* Lunette
* Landing
* Time-Lapse
* The Faust Business
* Perpetual Motion
* On the Deck
* Convergence
* Virgil Leading Dante into Hell Takes a Wrong Turning
* Death of an English Teacher
* Midknight Express
* The Crime Continuum
* Necessity is the Mother
* The Myth of Sisyphus
* Christmas Overtime: a Vignette

(1993)
* Learning to Fly
* Be Like You
* The Forest Chapel Bell
* Floodtide
* Under the Tree
* Something About a Demon
* A Length of Rope
* The Dungeon
* Consolations of the Wild One
* The Roof of the World
* The Falling Star
* Multicoloured Leaves in Bright Spirals
* The Manticore
* The Landscape Player
* The Seed of the Damned
* Lady, Tiger and Protozoon
* The Juggler
* In the Margins
* The Illustrated Student
* Troubleroot
* Zumbooruk
* Seven Fables of Yearning
* Goblin Sunrise
* Making a Feline
* The Landslide
* The Masterpiece
* Mr Found in a Bottle
* Three Friends
* The Man Who Threw His Voice
* The Peat Fire
* The Achilles Tendency
* Quasimodulus
* A Family Resemblance
* Judgment Day
* The Queen of Jazz
* Dr Perambulator Wants to Marry an Aubergine
* Rancid Kumquats are Not the Only Fruit
* The Sealed Room

(1994)
* The Duvet Thief
* Sucking the World's Thumb
* The Indigo Casbah
* The New Men
* Fallow
* Three Dancers
* The Octopus Jar
* Velocity Oranges
* Walpurgis
* Passengers
* The Man Who Mistook His Wife's Hat For the Mad Hatter's Wife
* Oaths
* Never Hug an Aardvark
* The Two Kingdoms
* The Taming of the Old Woman Who Lived in a Shrew
* Rainbow's End
* What To Do When the Devil Comes Round For Tea
* Tuberculosis Bells
* Cat O' Nine Tales
* Atlas Did Not Shrug
* Ghost Holiday
* Those Wonderful Words
* The Banshee
* Celia the Impaler
* The Wardrobe Tree
* Anna and the Dragon
* Six Characters in Search of an Executioner
* Loop
* The Big Lick
* Flash in the Pantheon
* Mastitis Groan
* Trombonhomie
* The Urban Freckle
* Worming the Harpy
* Eyelashes in My Nepenthe
* Romance With Capsicum
* There's a Woman With a Cactus Instead of a Head
* The Chimney
* A Carpet Seldom Found
* Flintlock Jaw
* One Man's Meat
* The Troubadours of Perception
* The Cakes of Gehenna
* Ten Grim Bottles
* Miserable With Groceries, Cuddly With Stubble
* Bracket
* The Thirty-Nine Million Steps

(1995)
* The Laughing Policeman in the Foreign Legion
* The Lover and the Grave
* A College Story
* Learning To Fall
* The Swiss Family Abacus
* The Semi-Precious Isle
* Cello I Love You
* A Horse Called Man
* The Good-News Grimoire
* Arquebus For Harlequin
* The King and Eye
* Thief Among Thieves
* Number 13½
* The Purloined Liver
* The Second Picture
* The Glossolalia of Hideo Frigg
* Éclair De Lune
* Madonna Park
* The Falling Lover
* The Blue Dwarf
* Grinding the Goblin
* Burke and Rabbit
* Percussion Cape
* The Golden Fleas
* Entropy
* The Apology
* Sexing the Confection
* Cosmic Bagatelle
* Pyramid and Thisbe
* The Furious Walnuts
* The Herb-Garden of Earthly Delights
* Eyelidiad
* Gone With The Wind in the Willows
* The Googol Seasons
* A Sort of Runic Rhyme
* The Impossible Mirror

(1996)
* The Business Diary of a Madman
* Rawhead and Bloody Bones
* Journey Through a Wall
* Primate Suspect
* Gatling Gums
* Elusive Plato
* The Hush of Falling Houses
* The Taste of the Moon
* A Person Not in the Story
* Mister Humphrey's Clock's Inheritance
* Go West, Young Ripper
* God in a Basement Flat
* The Metaphorical Marriage
* The Broom-Cupboard of Crossed Destinies
* Before Dawn in the Playing Fields
* Story From a Lost Anthology
* There Was a Ghoul Dwelt by a Mosque
* Bridge Over Troubled Blood
* Crawling King Prawn

(1997)
* The Animus of Objective Mammals
* The Quest of the Mouther
* Lunarhampton
* The Death of Ganymede
* Spermaceti Whiskers
* The Skull Farmers
* A Girl Like a Doric Column
* The Crippled Gollywog's Fox-Hunt
* A Vinaigrette
* Below the Carnival
* The Silver Necks
* The Wooden Salesman
* At the Molehills of Madness
* The Docking of Spaceship Earth
* Depressurised Ghost Story
* Nothing More Common
* Crash, With Shopping Trolleys
* Mortar Baby
* The Business Flight
* Matchlock Smith
* Thanatology Spleen
* The New Giraldus
* The Haunted Womb
* Voles
* The Pelican of Venice
* Pyramids of the Purple Atom

(1998)
* The Sound of Music in Hell
* The Expanding Woman
* The Singularity Spectres
* The Orange Goat
* Telegram Ma'am
* The Sickness of Satan
* Mah Jong Breath
* The Hypothesis
* The Tell-Tale Nose
* The Decibel Circus
* The Squonk Laughed
* Portrait of the Artist as a Rusty Bus
* Muscovado Lashes
* The Suppertime Sting

(1999)
* The Yellow Imp
* The Banker of Ingolstadt
* The Purple Pastor
* Thais Von Oort
* A Rape of Knots
* Ultima Thule
* Lanolin Brows
* Omophagia Ankles
* Alone With a Longwinded Soul
* Corneropolis
* The Muse Ouroboros
* The Spanish Cyclops
* The Swine Taster
* Gauntlet of Gorgons
* Far on Bicycles
* Young Werther Cheers Up
* The Mischief Towers

(2000)
* Surfing the Solar Wind
* The North Face of the Ego
* Tug of Worlds
* Engelbrecht at the Eisteddfod
* A Mermaid Supper
* Last Tango in Atlantis
* A Sandal Waiting to Happen
* A Monkey For All Seasons
* The Destruction of Destruction
* Engelbrecht and Ubu
* A Sumwot Labud Sattire
* The Chronic Argonauts Get Better
* The Undeniable Grin
* A Languid Elagabalus of the Tombs
* Asparagus on the Tooth
* No Stony Silence
* City of Blinks
* Jellydämmerung!
* The Macroscopic Teapot
* The Rake and the Fool
* Knight on a Bear Mountain
* The Hydrothermal Reich
* Toastmaster, Buttermistress
* The Story With a Clever Title
* The Century Just Gone
* Shipyards on Saturn
* The Marsh Callow

(2001)
* The Dirtiest Ararat
* The Crab
* The Lute and the Lamp
* Owlbeast
* Cockatrice at the Door
* The Hole Truth: a Lie
* Final Demand
* The Evil Side of Reginald Burke
* All For Nothing
* Tin in the Soul
* Robin Hood's New Mother
* The Wardrobe World
* Accordion Beach
* The Mice Will Play
* The Desiccated Sage
* Climbing the Tallest Tree in the World
* Islands in the Bathtub
* The Unsubtle Cages
* All Shapes Are Cretans
* Less is More
* The Lake of Flavours
* The World Beyond the Stairwell
* The West Pole
* Streetcorner Mouse
* The Innumerable Chambers of the Heart

(2002)
* In the Moonless Gutter
* Two Fat Men in a Very Thin Country
* Paradise Discarded
* Adventures in the Grin Trade
* Nowhere Near Milk Wood
* Sailing to the Island of Tools on the Ship of Fools
* The Gibbon in the Garret
* The Itchy Skin of Creepy Aplomb
* The Hyperacusis of Chumbly Mucker
* Eternal Horizon
* A Curry in Camelot
* The Cuckoos of Bliss
* The Small Miracle
* The Mermaid of Curitiba
* The Meltwater Republic
* The Toes of the Sun
* The Lollipop God is Dead
* The Eeriness that Lurks on the Far Side of Furniture
* The Old House Under the Snow Where Nobody Goes Except You and Me Tonight

(2003)
* The Decay of the Pilgrim
* The Cargo Cults of Salty Kiss Island
* Pity the Pendulum
* Ictus Purr
* Finding the Book of Sand
* A New Universal History of Infamy
* Encore
* The Jam of Hypnos
* Life and the Plumbline
* The Forever Forest
* The Office Castaway
* Life Sentence
* On Chromium Pond
* The Stuffed Goddess

(2004)
* The Crystal Cosmos
* Milk and Ladders
* Niddala
* The Minotaur in Pamplona
* The Promised Labyrinth
* Gut Road
* The Parasol Clerks
* Chianti's Inferno
* One's a Crowd
* Grumblebelly
* The Inflatable Stadium
* Early Morning Chocolate in Madrid
* 333 and a Third
* The Upper Reaches

(2005)
* Lovespoons in Peril
* Poe Pie
* The Candid Slyness of Scurrility Forepaws
* The Planet of Perfect Happiness
* Return to Zenda
* Sending Freedom Far Away
* Billion World Boat
* The Impregnable Fortress
* The Lunar Tritons
* Betrayal
* Errata of our Quiet Desperation
* The Lip Service
* False Dawn of Parrots
* Suicide: a Beginner's Guide
* The Rhondda Rendezvous
* Explosion
* Bitter in Sour
* Fighting Back
* Anton Arctic and the Conquest of the Scottish Pole
* The Culture Shock
* Twenty Six Broken Hearts
* The Ski Slope
* In the Sink
* The Homemade Hookah
* Scything for Girls
* Bless my Cholesterol Socks
* The Sweetheart Rosary
* The Bathing Bells

(2006)
* Dunces and Dragons
* Clouds Over Tunetown
* Last Thursday
* Envy
* Bald Men in a Shampoo Warehouse
* Vanishing
* Doom Laden Haven
* The Six Sentinels
* In Moonville
* The Quixote Candidate
* But it Pours
* Degrees of Separation
* The Folded Page
* The Surface Area of a Ghost's Wanderings
* The Most Boring Story
* The City that was Itself
* The Man who Gargled with Gargoyle Juice
* The Tallest Midget
* The Kissable Climes
* Abomination With Rice
* The Non-Existent Viscount in the Trees
* Ye Olde Resignation
* When the Microscopic Giants Took Over Happenstance
* Venus and Stupid
* Cracking Nuts with Jan Hammer
* Von Ryan's Daughter's Express
* In Sunsetville
* Fable with Turkish Coffee
* Sir Cheapskate
* Playing Impossible Instruments
* The Gala of Implausible Songs
* Oh, Whistle While You Work, and I'll Come to You, My Dwarf
* The Time Tunnel Orchid
* Rommel Cobra's Swimming Carnival
* The Hemisemidemiurge
* On Your Marks
* Castle Cesare

(2007)
* Castor on Troubled Waters
* The Plucked Plant
* Interstellar Domestic
* Canis Raver
* When Wales Played Asgård
* The Day the Town of Porthcawl was Accidentally Twinned with the Capital of the Cheese and Biscuits Empire
* The Cream-Jest of Unset Custard
* The Private Pirates Club
* Shared House
* A Real Nowhere Man
* The Strongest Monster
* Stale Air
* Suttee and Sweep
* The Mirror in the Looking Glass
* The Concise Picaresque Adventures of the Wanderlust Bridge
* Personification
* Lem's Last Book
* Smuggling Old Nick to Newfoundland
* Lettuce Prey
* Azure Like It
* Black Toffee Glues
* Tarzan at the Apple's Core
* Where Angels Fear to Bake Bread
* Pleasure For Treasure
* Riders of the Purple Mezzotint
* The Sponsored Hearse
* The Leveller of Neptune
* Boo to a Goose
* Whaling Well
* The Tenant of Arcimboldo Hall
* Canon Alberic's Photo-Album
* Message to Rosita
* Zucchini Overdrive
* Musicians in the Cold
* ¡Qué Pena!
* How Don Cosquillas Earned His Name
* Fanny is Famished
* The Strings of Segovia
* Description of a Liar
* The Juice of Days

(2008)
* Paired Down
* Nightmare Alley
* Rhodomontade and Piffle
* The Feet of Sciron
* The Laughable Career of the Tickle Master
* Risible and Shine
* Astragal and Bingbong
* Sackbut and Splashes
* Tarzan of the Chardonnay
* Found Kidneys
* Up Without Away
* Sinking Fast
* Salad in Dallas
* In Eclipseville
* The Groin Scratcher
* Plop Fiction
* Where the Sun Doesn't Shine
* Cop Hospital
* Plums and Oriels
* The Glue of the Scream
* The Rolling Hills
* The Furry Godmother
* Petal Put the Kelly On
* Celebration Day
* Oh Ho!
* Loneliness
* The Ghost Written Autobiography of a Disembodied Spirit

(2009)
* Hell Toupée
* Giddy Up
* Inside the Outline
* The Wings of Phoebus
* The Pots of Pan
* The Skin of Marsyas
* The Earlobes of Aesop
* The Shoelaces of Jupiter
* The Clangers of Paris
* Nemo's Omen
* Fanny of the Apes
* The Smutty Tamarinds
* Casimir the Converter
* Southbound Satin
* The Dwarf Shortage
* On the Shoulders of Pipsqueaks
* Wood for the Trees
* Buffoons of the Moon
* The Underwear Shop
* Rediffusion
* Arms Against a Sea
* Home Suit Home
* Poorly Dawkins
* The Sun Trap
* The Curdling of the Milky Way
* The Martian Monocles
* The Path of Garden Forks
* Fanny of the Opera
* The Phantom Festival
* The Pink Giant
* Knobheads and Dipsticks
* The Shapes Down There
* The Impossible Inferno
* The Gunfight
* The Antediluvian Uncle
* Better the Devil
* The Mistake
* The Violation
* Gaspar Jangle's Seance
* Pussy in Boots
* The Precious Mundanity
* My Own Worst Anemone
* Flicking a Fleck of Freckled Flapper
* The Armchair Generals
* The Darkest White

(2010)
* The Abnormalities of Stringent Strange
* The Talkative Star
* The Flesh Stocking
* The Astral Disruptor
* Eight Blathering Buccaneers
* The Grave Demeanour
* Is My Wife on Mars?
* The Pollinators
* The Spoon
* The Spare Hermit
* The Defining Moment
* Penal Colony
* Sally Forth
* Mate in Pi
* The Ditching
* Jenny Khan
* Stand and Deliver
* The Psychoanalyst
* Aldrin's the Buzzword
* Trenchfoot
* The Ugliest Idol in Christendom
* Moonchaser
* Discrepancy
* All in a Flap
* The Monkey's Pawpaw
* The Seal of Disapproval
* Down in the Park
* Sticky White Hands
* Cuntlock
* Flying Saucer Harmonies
* The Man Toucan
* Chuckleberry Grin
* The Thousand and One Pints
* My Biological Prism
* The Censor
* The Coandă Effect
* Monsters of the Victorian Age
* An Inconvenient Fruit
* The Maze
* Hatstands on Zanzibar
* The Magic Gone
* Latitude, Longitude and Plenitude
* Sangria in the Sangraal
* The Kind Generosity of Theophrastus Tautology
* Scaramouche's Pouting Mouth
* Knossos in its Glory
* The Quims of Itapetinga
* The Porcelain Pig
* Mad March Stylist
* The Xaratan
* The Yeasty Rise and Half-Baked Fall of Lyndon Williams
* Lyndon: God
* Bone Idle in the Charnel House
* Happiness Leasehold

(2011)
* Simplicity
* How to Lose Friends and Alienate People
* The Bannister
* My Crow Nation
* The Appendix
* The Blue Jewel Fruit
* The Gargantuan Legion
* The Mark of Cain, The Jeremy of Abel
* Orpheus on the Underground
* Hagmouth Town
* The Apedog Incident
* The Paradoxical Pachyderms
* A Stitched Dog's Tongue
* My Foot Walked Off Without Me
* Topaz Days, Emerald Nights
* Westward Ivanhoe!
* The Tale That Never Got Told
* The Polo Match
* The Fantastical Scholar's Chop-Logic
* Spider in Slippers
* The Puppet Masters of Tau Ceti
* ¿Qué Cosas?
* Making it Up as I Go Along
* The Logistics of Fictional Life
* The Integers
* The Shrug
* The Pastel Whimsy
* The Great Bicycle Migration
* The Longest Name
* The Esplanade
* The Rotten Otter
* The Ducks of Hazard
* The Extractor Fan
* The Garden Hoppers
* Knights that Go Bump into Things
* The Messiah of the Mannequins
* The Cheeky Monkey
* When the Faun Fell
* The Melody Tree
* The Burning Ears
* The Gates of Corn and Toffee
* Whether the Weatherman
* Note to Oneself
* Said the Spook
* Sigma Octantis
* Transmigrating the Bishop
* The Notorious Unclemuncher
* Read All About It
* Putting Things Off
* The Parable of the Homeless Fable
* Vampiric Gramps
* The Goat That Gloated

(2012)
* The Soft Landing
* The Canapés of Wrath
* Rhysop's Fables
* The Plug
* Genghis Kan't
* Bachelor of Voodoo
* Pulpo
* Rhysop's Return
* Vanity of Vanities
* The Queue
* Caterpillar the Hun
* The Memory Fumes
* Fossils
* The Heat Death of Mr Universe
* Owl Scared of the Dark
* The Television
* Butterbrow
* The Lock of Love
* Sheer Lunar Sea
* My Bearable Smugness
* Suddenly
* The Gargoyles of Black Wood
* The Trial Separation
* Cats' Eyes
* The Grin of the Doll Who Ate His Mother's Face in the Dark
* The Cat that Chilled the Scene
* The Reverse Midas
* The Cottage in the Cottage
* Moonmoths, Umbrellas and Oranges
* The Tetrahedron Offensive
* The Name of the Nose
* The Swinger
* The Experimenter's Chagrin
* Mr Hyde and Dr Seek
* This Werewolf Prefers Muesli
* The Sock Camels
* The Haggler of Affection
* The Lap of Your Gaze
* Sunstorm
* The Dark Horse
* The Secret Passage
* The Pig Iron Mouse Dooms the Moon
* Inside Out
* Trophy Wife
* The Realisation of Vast Headgear
* The Tools
* Left on the Shelf
* The Apple of My Sky
* The Baker Street Cimmerian
* Doom It Heavenwards
* The Days of the Turbans
* Letters From My Windmill
* The Further Fangs of Suet Pudding
* The Pocket Shops
* The Iron Age
* Invisible Letters
* The Ledge Nymphs
* Fairy Dusk
* The Musical Universe
* Train of Thought
* The Locksmith

(2013)
* Najort Esroh
* The Cowardly Custard Apple
* What I Fear Most
* Chameleons
* Open or Wrapped
* The Cure of the Scandal in Averroës
* The Warlord
* Señor Chimera’s Hysterical History
* The Bone Throwers
* Behind Every Ghost
* The Blanket Ban
* The Despicable Bungling of Yorick Porridge
* Spoiling the View
* Not Looking
* The Bicycle-Centaur
* Nozzles
* The Statue
* Shelling the Toad
* Corsets on the Outside
* The Fairy and the Dinosaur
* The Bubble Bursts
* The Floppiness of Mucky Puppet
* Love Keys
* Tribulation Trio
* Unicorn on the Cob
* The Anvil Cloud
* A Dame Abroad
* His Wife's Whiskers
* The Knees of Kionga
* A Word in Your Shell-Like
* Bangers the Mash
* The Mouth of Hell
* Double Meaning
* The Taste of Turtle Tears
* In the Can
* When Pushkin Came to Shovekin
* Fifty Cups of Lady Grey
* Fat Cat Fable
* The Great Me
* The Modesty Men

(2014)
* The Prodigal Beard
* The Bungle Duke
* The Requirements of Desire
* Porthole Parables
* The Forever Man
* The Playtime of Monunculus
* The Nick of Time
* New Improved Recipe for Disaster
* Travels with my Antinomy
* Monkey Knows a Thing
* Benchmark
* The Bones of Jones
* The Haggis Eater
* Bottled Love Story
* The Unkissed Artist Formerly Known as Frog
* Jekking the Oofers
* Canute a Little
* Starfish Wish
* Gathering the Genial Genies
* The Melon Seller
* Gold, Myrrh and Frankenstein
* When the Tide Comes in, Belinda Puts Out
* My Most Metafictional Tale
* The Rowing Machine
* The Square Circle
* The Sublime Voyage of Ariana Aragão
* Beyond Paraparapara
* Died For Puns
* A Spaceship in the Shape of a Woman
* The Memory Palace
* The Vendetta Virus

(2015)
* What Did You Do For Doomsday?
* Universe Tower
* Mundi Mourning
* The Waters of Fosretaweht
* No Fury
* An Unpleasant Romance
* The Skeleton of Contention
* The Belly Orchard
* Your Day
* The Guided Tour
* What the Shadow Sees
* Galaxy Whispers
* The Salsa Raft
* A Comedy of Gambits
* How Gangrene was my Sally
* The Bus Museum
* The International Geophysical Ear
* Last Chance
* Nothing Else
* The Promotion
* In Stitches
* The Apocryphal Wonder
* Most Unwise
* Why Look at Me Smugly?
* I Entered the Forest at Midnight
* The Monumental Mason
* The Burning Nose
* Boolean Amours
* Laurel and Jihadi

(2016)
* Diagonal Man
* For the Sake of Saké
* The Tatty Bye
* The Overlooked Story
* Mummyfixation
* The Kink of Human Mildness
* As I Walked Out One Midsummer Night's Dream
* The Seashell Contract
* Starlight Girl
* The Gusty Hole Gave Vent
* Junkshop in Oestrus
* The Street Poet
* Arc of We
* Confessions of a Medicated Lurker
* Where Everyone Wins
* The Kind of Man
* The Son of Una Gunn
* Tumbleweed Tantrums
* Phut Tu Ping and the Spittoon Gang
* The Proper Setting
* Billie Holiday on Vacation
* The Same Old Zoetrope
* Rosco Pico Train
* Four Agora Corners
* The Selfie Habit
* The Kizomba Wanderers
* The Tooth on the Floss
* The Nine Impossible Temples of Chaud-Mellé
* Longfellow in the Compressor
* Fudge Man Chew
* Sarsaparilla Sasquatch
* Half a Dozen of the Other
* The Falling Kite Landed on my Back like an Angel Attack
* A Long Story Short
* What We Gibber About When We Gibber About Gibbons
* The Birthday Message
* Cloud Farming in Wales
* The Ageless Agelasts
* Chopsticks

(2017)
* The Workplace Hugger
* Hepcats are from Neptune, Bum Notes are from Uranus
* Small Freedom
* Heavy Rain on a Slow Train
* The Four Sea Sons
* The Babbling Brook
* The Nuclear Family
* Barbarian Gran
* The Tyrant Craft
* Alphabet Soup